Bad Inside Me

There are times when I think about love. When I am alone in my room, just about to fall asleep, or when that certain song comes on. I find love, well, lovely. I want to "awww" at that cute couple holding hands, and congratulate them on their "amazing relationship". However there are times it sicken's me. The idea really, the drama, the passion, the romance. It's disgusting. I want to hate it; Is it strange I find love hateful?!? Love makes everything much more complicated. I probably don't have any say in love if I had never had my first kiss or "true love".
I guess that is the bad inside me, I like to hate "love" because it makes me feel better about being alone. Even after a hateful day of love, I still find loneliness. It's not like I have to be with people 24/7 and once I face myself I feel lonely. I am used to loneliness, we are companions. When it comes along I embrace it and all its emptiness. It annoys me to see people who can't be alone. I have been alone for a while and I feel everyone should be able to spend an afternoon alone in a public area without the urge to call up the first person you know.
Maybe that is why I an disgusted by the idea of love, because love requires two, and I, am only one. I think it is time for me to get out of my comfort zone. To say goodbye to my companion, and punch love right in the face.